I don't know if this is an irrational fear or not, but I have avoided posting about my pregnancy on this blog because who knows what kind of psychos are out there.  I think my mind has just changed because I have not been keeping any kind of a diary about what has been going on or how I've been feeling about this whole event and I think it would be something nice to look back on - not just for me, but for this spawn of mine.

We found out we were pregnant in the middle of April.  I had taken one pregnancy test and it came back positive, but realistic me thought of the other tests I have taken in the past and how some of them have come up fuzzy and I have often been unsure of the results.  Even though this one was a pretty clear positive, I still figured it might be a false positive and wanted to wait a couple days before taking another test and giving in to the fact that we really were pregnant.

Over the next couple days, I kept saying to Jeremy that I thought we were pregnant.  We finally went to WalMart and Jeremy suggested that we buy a test while we were there.  I told him I had one at home and that one had come back positive already, but I was going to wait one more day before taking the other test.  Jeremy couldn't believe it!  (And I still can't believe that I didn't tell him about the test before - maybe it's because of all the other ones that I've taken in the past that haven't amounted to anything).

When I did finally take the test, it of course came back positive.  And then the panic set it.  Excitement too, but panic might be closer to what I was feeling.  We hadn't really been trying to have a baby, but we weren't preventing either.  We kind of had the attitude of, "when it happens, it happens."  We knew we were as prepared as we would ever be to have a kid.  We are financially secure, old enough to be able to handle the responsibility and have more patience, but not so old that we will be 60 when the kid graduates from college.  Nonetheless...panic...

The only thing that wasn't timed right was the fact that we had been planning for a few years to buy a piece of land we had been eyeing and build a house.  It just figures that the land went up for sale and we were in the process of getting the house ready to sell.

We decided that we weren't going to let this interrupt what was going on in our lives at that point, so we continued with the sale of the house.  Why not throw our lives into utter turmoil all at once, right?  The house sold rather quickly and we ended up having to move out in 2 weeks time.  We found the house near downtown and moved in pretty quickly and easily.

After we were in that little house, things were not looking so well.  We kept hearing horror stories from the folks that rented the back efficiency apartment on the house and we had already had a little taste of the venom this old crotchity lady was capable of.  But we thought we could make it work out - we took photos of the place and followed up our meetings with her by letter.  After all, we only needed to make it work for 6 months to a year - we could do this!

But stuff beyond our control was happening with the house.  It's a VERY old house - the floors are not level, and the plumbing was apparantly very bad.  Stains started to appear in the carpet - none of which we were responsible for.  And about 2 1/2 months into it, the toilet and bath stopped draining properly.  After having 3 plumbers out to the house, and still no result, we decided it was time to look for a new place to move on to.  It also wasn't helping that the third plumber opened the pipe in the cellar and all the waste water that was sitting in it dumped into the cellar.  The whole house smelled like shit and I really didn't feel okay staying there anymore.

I started checking the paper and online ads and happened to find one on Craiglist that allowed pets!  And they were asking less than what we were paying for the shithole.  AND it was in a much nicer area of town.  AND there was a dishwasher!!  Jeremy called the guy and we arranged for a time to see the place.  We decided very quickly that we wanted to apply, so that is what we did.  Luckily, he chose us and we were able to move in right away, even though the main floor bathroom needed to be refloored.  We just had to use the basement bathroom for the first week.

So that's where we are now.  Getting re-settled and hopefully soon we will be able to start the process of building.

As to the pregnancy, things have been going well and I really don't have many complaints.  We've made our regular checkups and everything has been fine.  When the doctor tries to listen to his heartbeat with the handheld device, he kicks it and moves, so she has been having a hard time getting his heartbeat.  Obviously, he's fine if he is active enough to outmaneuver the doctor even though he's confined to my gut.

Last week, I had my baby shower hosted by my aunt Sherry.  It was a lot of fun and everyone was more than generous with the gifts they gave.  It was nice to see a lot of my relatives that I haven't seen in awhile, as well as a few friends I also haven't seen.  So we have a great start on the items we have needed before the baby arrives.  We have the furniture already in the room and put together, so mostly now we just need some more clothes and bedding and whatnot.

Last night, Jeremy was able to really feel the little guy kick.  I was laying down and he rolled from the right side of my abdomen to the left.  When he stopped on the left side, I could still feel the lump of a knee or elbow poking out.  So I told Jeremy to put his hand right on the bump.  And wouldn't you know it - he rolled completely over to the left side again, jabbing his extremity out the whole time.  Jeremy thought it was pretty cool.  I still think it feels super weird - like this thing is going to burst forth from my stomach.

Only ten more weeks